Should I Worry About Getting Men As A Dark Skinned Black Woman

"Sometimes my experiences are dismissed. For case, they say things like it didn't happen which is quite funny because it's coming from a place of privilege on their part."

By Aleida Hammond

Colorism. The hideously ugly little sister of racism. It causes discrimination among people of the same race. Hatred and split up. Information technology is an outcome that when spoken up near, the first reaction is annoyance. Which is why I wanted to talk about information technology with different perspectives. Information technology affects a lot of people, and although information technology is such an explicit result, whether in the media, in music videos or in dating, it is barely talked well-nigh. And I wanted to kickoff to effigy out why. It needs to exist known and spoken about more all effectually the world, non just in the black community.

Generalization of our black brothers?

Colorism is a topic which annoys a lot of people. Information technology is a sensitive topic and I wanted to break it down too as I could. Subjects similar these are topics that are important, but people seem to ignore because its uncomfortable. I commencement wanted to look at the definition of colorism.

The definition, which appeared in 1983, credited to Alice Walker, states that colorism is "the prejudice or discrimination against individuals with a dark pare tone, typically among people of the same ethnic or racial group." This explains information technology to a tee really. Colourism is a deep routed problem, and like information technology or not nosotros tin see this today in many ethnic minority groups.

One bear witness that I actually remember explained colorism well is blackness-ish. Although it in an American telly bear witness, it explains the problem in a simple and yet effective way that people across the world can chronicle to.

It stated that "black people come in many shades, from Mariah Carey to Wesley Snipes. Considering nosotros look dissimilar, nosotros go discriminated confronting differently. For example, in the case of OJ Simpson, they distorted the lighting in a mag and so that he looked darker to make him seem more than guilty".

"In Asian communities, some people utilize visors and umbrellas to avoid the lord's day. In Indian communities, some night-skinned actors say that they struggle getting roles fifty-fifty in Bollywood movies. And in the Latin customs, products that bleach your skin are becoming increasingly popular. Slave owners divided the black community in half, putting dark slaves on the fields, and fairer slaves in the house, which has created tension and divide up until this twenty-four hour period." I constitute this insight to be very interesting.

Every bit a blackness woman in the Great britain, a dark-skinned black woman, this issue is very personal to me. I personally cannot recall any explicit moments where I have been affected by colorism, unless it was tied into racism, which is a whole other topic. Being the only black child in my master school, and and then jumping from that to a primarily blackness and Asian (but nonetheless very white area overall), information technology was very difficult for me to navigate who I was as a darker skinned woman.

I have created this article to explore the perspective of young people on colorism, equally well as to address the stigma that black boys don't really care almost colorism. While I think there is evidence to back this truth, for example every bit soon every bit you say the word "colorism" to whatever black boy, they start shifting a bit sideways. Nonetheless, I wanted to hear other people's perspectives on this topic.

Many of my brothers and sisters, however, have experienced more than explicit examples of colorism. And I first wanted to give a voice to the women, black women specifically. Considering we have to address the fact that the black women are the virtually underappreciated of all, and that we take not been given plenty of a phonation.

A perspective from our queens.

It is not only my stance that matters. As well as the fact that it would be biased and unreliable to voice my opinion and my opinion only. Then, I went to expect for other people's opinions to develop a more grounded based foundation. My girl popped up to my question, and this is what she had to say on it.

She stated that "I become why some would say this, sometimes my experiences are dismissed, for example they say things similar it didn't happen which is quite funny because it's coming from a identify of privilege on their role".

I understood this stance loud and clear. Every bit people of color in general we are surrounded past our own issues and discriminations. Nonetheless, we still confront our ain divides within our ain community merely because we don't address information technology plenty. For example, fairer skinned women are considered to be more desirable in relationships, in the media. The listing is endless. And the rise of dear and appreciation of nighttime-skinned women in music videos, television set and on social media is lovely. Only that doesn't hateful all of our issues have gone away. In order to movement forwards, we need to address these problems and not simply ignore then because they're not as bad and because they're non as explicit as they used to be.

While reading an commodity by the guardian, I stumbled upon an interesting stance. A woman in the UK wrote that "many black girls I pursued told me that they were only attracted to calorie-free-skin black boys", while another confessed that their mother was ashamed of their peel: "At school, in mosque and at family unit gatherings, I was demonised."

A lot of black women experience betrayed past black men because of the suffering they accept been through, and the fact that a lot of the time, they attack the states the about, when they should be on our side.

Another friend of mine had something to say on this exact issue. She stated that "I recall some people (boys) talk about it, but a lot don't and they add to the problem. They don't uplift women merely instead dispense and belittle us to make themselves experience bigger and more manly".

I received an opinion from my closest friend about the argument in the title of this article.

The statement says that "I hold to an extent. Just its white boys likewise. And most blackness boys actually get for dark skins. I feel similar boys in general should be mentioned. Considering black boys got their struggles too with white boys acting the same but having less struggles. I would say. Say how boys in full general being stupid and racist. You can mention blackness boys going against the beauty in their own kind. But I'd say yes all boys."

Although I agree with certain elements of this view, to me it but seemed like it was dismissing the issue at hand. It portrays a view (almost blackness boys actually get for nighttime skins) that just but isn't true, and has been proved by history. This view presents a dismissal of what night skin women face up, also as generalizing the problem and non acting like in that location is light skinned privilege. While on the topic of generalization, my close friend said this.

"I think the statement is quite diverse and when information technology comes to topics within the blackness community, I remember nosotros should strive to promote unionship instead of sectionalization. I think the major trouble that people notice with it is that SOME of them didn't defend black women as ofttimes when they confront disadvantages." She too stated that "But e'er say 'some people' to avoid generalizing them all".

Overall, I think that out of all the statements that I received, this ane summed up the issue with the nigh eloquence. Information technology demonstrates an stance which is not closed minded, but still firm and not weak.

So, what do the boys take to say near this?

Colorism in general is a sticky subject. I knew that it's a subject that annoys people and makes people uncomfortable. This is precisely why I wanted to write an article about it. Like information technology or not, it is an issue that affects a lot of people. And information technology affects night-skinned women the most. Features that are considered to be "dominating" and "sexy" on our male person counterparts are considered to exist "masculine" and "threatening" on us. The fact is that we are non only ridiculed for our features by other races, but by people in our own race.

While reading an article from The Guardian, I read a response that was surprising. A man stated that "As a medium-tone black man living in the Britain, I accept experienced and perpetuated colourism several times. Equally a teenager, many black girls I pursued told me that they were only attracted to low-cal-pare black boys. For many black men, an attractive golden complexioned woman is a sign of success and status, equally is evident from the skin tone of highly successful black sportsmen and entertainers in the UK and US. Many won't acknowledge it publicly, simply it's an uncomfortable truth". What fabricated it surprising to me was how explicit and to the point it was.

I asked some of my male friends and associates what they thought about the supposition I fabricated, as well as the statement in general if it hadn't of come from me.

I of my friends mentioned that the supposition was "true" and that, "we kinda but shrug information technology off and say it's not that deep".

What I plant most interesting (but non shocking), was that most of the boys I asked disagreed with the comment.

One stated that "some boys become penalised for beingness a colourist when information technology's just their principal preference of girls. That'southward why they get frustrated at the topic".

Another stated that they "don't concord. I'm open to take a discussion about that, without acting like a brick wall. People practice it, it happens, people discriminate confronting people in their own race"

Preference in full general has always been the ugly niggling cousin of colourism. It ties into favouritism, and can be highly deceptive. For me, you tin can have whatever preference (and I use that give-and-take very lightly) you desire. That'southward absolutely fine. But the result arises when you country that yous take your quote unquote preferences, and notwithstanding get out of your way to bash night-skinned women unprovoked.

The general consensus that I got was that it was a generalisation.

"I don't think you can generalise black boys. Of course, at that place are some that don't intendance but there are many that practice. Amongst the people I know though, colourism has never been an issue, I just hear of things on social media more than time". This was also stated past a friend of mine.

Finally, one said that "Colourism is a problem within the black diaspora, simply I feel like there has been a march of progress for the community, despite of the Twitter blasts and electric current examples of famous people sticking to a lighter shade. I also feel like black boys understand the issue but some for sone it'due south not actual self-hatred just because information technology seems similar blackness girls don't go the same dear. Plus, I experience like the force per unit area and blasting is what makes black boys turn into a brick wall equally information technology seems too much and constant blasting towards them even though not all the facts are truthful".

Conclusion, if there even is one yet

This array of perspectives to me honestly wasn't surprising. It'due south nice to hear a different perspective. Overall though, there has been a route blockage somewhere.

There is a gap. Black boys say they would want to talk about it, but black women experience as if blackness men have neglected this chat. So, there is clearly something wrong here.

The fact that we tin't make a solid conclusion is something that tin't be ignored.

Nosotros cannot act like we stand together against the big sister chosen racism, when we continually ignore its little sister colorism.

Aleida Hammond is an creative person, writer and a poet. Her hobbies include playing the guitar, writing short stories and poetry and art. Currently studying at Loughborough University, she has finished a foundation course and is going on to her offset year of studying Fine Art. What got her into art and writing was the encouragement of her primary school teachers. They encouraged her to use channel her imagination and continue to be creative. Other hobbies that she has are practice, basketball, reading and trip the light fantastic.